Posted on by

Caraganza First Drive Review 2024 Nissan Versa: A simple slice of automotive humility

I admit I’m a bit spoiled when it comes to cars. Every week, my driveway turns into a parking lot for the latest, greatest, and most gadget-laden vehicles imaginable. Most weeks, I’m greeted by a top-of-the-line model, brimming with enough technology to make James Bond jealous. There’s no Q waiting to show me around, of course—though I’ve often wished for a car with missile launchers or machine guns (sadly, none of them have shown up yet).

Instead, what I do get are machines packed with self-driving features, sensors that watch your every move, and a host of safety features that would make even the most neurotic grandmother feel calm. From seats that massage like you’re being pampered by a professional to refrigerated cup holders and customizable interior lighting that make it feel like you’re cruising inside Studio 54. All the while, Juan—my imaginary Filipino masseuse—works out every knot in my back as I drive.

But all these luxuries come at a cost. Sometimes, the safety systems act like an overzealous school teacher, slapping your hand for even the smallest infraction. Forward-collision warnings? Sure, they’ll keep you from mowing down pedestrians, but the speed limit buzzers and lane departure shakes? They’re like being trapped in a German torture chamber disguised as a carnival ride.

And then, just as I’m getting used to being coddled, the universe reminds me that not every car comes with these James Bond-esque luxuries. Enter the 2024 Nissan Versa—a car that isn’t just a breath of fresh air, but a whole gust of normality. There’s no Q, no Studio 54, and certainly no Juan this week.

The Versa is like a plain loaf of white bread in a world of artisanal sourdough. It’s not here to impress you with fancy features. There’s no sport mode, no paddle shifters, no luxury sound system with a name so exotic it could be a brand of bottled water. What you get is a straightforward, no-nonsense subcompact that quietly goes about its business in a sea of luxury SUVs and oversized sedans.

Of course, it’s not without its quirks. The rear collision warning? It seems to think my perfectly flat driveway is a cliff and promptly slams the brakes as soon as I try backing out. And the lack of a built-in navigation system means you’re relying on Apple CarPlay or Android Auto—except that my Android decided to take naps at random, disconnecting itself as though it had better things to do.

The 1.6-liter engine? Let’s just say it doesn’t exactly get your blood pumping. With 122 horsepower on tap, merging onto the highway is less Fast & Furious and more Indiana Jones trying to outrun a boulder… except in slow motion. As for the CVT transmission, Nissan claims it “mimics shifting,” but it’s like watching a child imitate an adult—cute, but not convincing.

Yet, here’s the thing: the Versa does exactly what it’s supposed to. It gets you from point A to point B, and it does so without fuss. Sure, it won’t win any races or give you a massage on the way, but it will keep you safe and save you money at the pump. In a world where subcompact sedans are fast becoming an endangered species, the Versa stands as one of the few survivors—a reminder that not every car needs to be a luxury chariot or an overstuffed tech box.

In the end, the 2024 Nissan Versa is a refreshing slice of humble pie in an automotive world that’s getting increasingly decadent. It’s not exciting, it’s not luxurious, but it’s functional—and sometimes, that’s all you really need. While it might not appeal to someone used to driving around in the automotive equivalent of a private jet, it’s an affordable and practical choice for the rest of us. As long as you don’t expect Juan the masseuse to come along for the ride, the Versa will get the job done, with no frills, no fuss—just simple, reliable transportation.

2024 Nissan Versa SR
MSRP: $20,300
MSRP (as tested): $22,960
Engine: 1.6 liter i-4 122 hp @ 6,300 rpm, 114 lb-ft torque @ 4,000 rpm
Transmission: Continuously variable-speed automatic
Fuel Mileage (EPA): 32 city, 40 highway, 35 combined
Fuel Mileage (as tested, mixed conditions): 34 mpg
Base Curb Weight: 2717 lbs.

Exterior Dimensions (inches)
Wheelbase: 103.1
Length: 177
Width, without mirrors: 68.5
Height: 57.7
Minimum Ground Clearance:5.2

Interior Dimensions
Passenger / Seating Capacity: 5
Total Passenger Volume (cubic feet): 88.9
Front Head Room (inches): 39.5
Front Leg Room (inches): 44.5
Front Shoulder Room (inches): 53.1
Front Hip Room (inches): 50.9
Second Row Head Room (inches): 36.3
Second Row Leg Room (inches): 31
Second Row Shoulder Room (inches): 53.6
Second Row Hip Room (inches): 50.1
Trunk Space (cubic feet): 15

Warranty
Basic: 3 yr./ 36,000 mi.
Drivetrain: 5 yr./ 60,000 mi.
Rust: 5 yr./ unlimited mi.
Roadside assistance: 3 yr./ 36,000 mi.

Greg Engle
Latest posts by Greg Engle (see all)

Comments

comments